This is a continuation of part 1.

There is no such thing as a “right way” (nor a wrong one)

One of the distinctions that was deeply insightful for me was how we usually try to do things the “right way”, rather than doing them from our inner being: from our knowing, our wanting, our feeling, and our common sense.

We spend a lot of our time and energy trying to figure out the “right way” of working, creating our business and engaging in our relationships.

What if we focused instead on trying to understand how they work?

That takes curiosity and openness.

If you don’t like the way you feel, change how you think.

We have been given the gift of thought, and we get to use it however we want.

Indeed, according to the 3 Principles (“Operating System” that Michael Neill and others teach), our feelings are a byproduct of our thinking.

One of the key points that stood out for me is that nobody needs to change who they are to succeed at something. It’s often much simpler than we make it.

That was profound, and contrasted with the usual:

“Who would you need to become in order to…?”

At our essence, we can remain the same. We might need to develop new skills (e.g. communication skills, sales, ability to focus, money-making, …), but we get to keep who we are at the core, we get to do it in our own way.

“There is no right way, there is just my way.”

“And now, the end is near
And so I face the final curtain
My friend, I’ll say it clear
I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain
I’ve lived a life that’s full
I traveled each and every highway
And more, much more than this
I did it my way”

Frank Sinatra – My way (video).

How do you create something?

1. You decide what you want.
2. You go in that direction.

The fullness of us is of more value than any part of us (even the “best parts”), and that includes all our imperfections and quirkiness.

“The fullness of you is made to thrive.”

An insight I am still sitting with is that:

• It’s easier to create what you want rather than what you think you can get.

“We are all just lightbulbs and we work better when we are plugged in.”

Desmond Tutu

Another distinction that I found interesting was the natural way of doing things (= how we are designed to function when we are fully our unconditioned selves), versus the “normal way” of doing things. When we operate from our unconditioned selves, everything works much better, and we do get abnormal results… When we use the normal way, we get normal results…

Which world do you live in?

The idea can seem pretty crazy to some.

What if the world you live in (the world you see, taste, touch, …) is actually made of thought?

Would life start making more sense or less sense?

We are feeling the quality of our thinking, not feeling our outside circumstances.

World 1 is made of thought. It is the imaginary and quite arbitrary world where we strive for a “right way to be”.

It is full of judgements, and includes the following elements among others:

Morality

Rules

should and shouldn’ts

dos and don’ts

better and worse

punishment & reward

good/bad, right/wrong

normal/abnormal

us/them

judgement/validation

winners/losers

guilt/shame

need to know and follow the rules

it is based on drive

grit

discipline (I know, I  have written about this article, and it has its purpose, but there are limitations to what self-discipline can accomplish)

commitment

intellect

manipulation

skill

requires “the right structure”

past/future oriented

“every time”

dreaming

World 1 appears as a safe world.

But it’s safety is an illusion, and our potential for fulfilment is limited in this world.

A lot of our institutions and businesses have been built in and for this world.

Yet, there is a second world, a world of infinite potential and infinite possibilities.

I call it World 2.

It is based on the following elements:

What I want/what I am drawn to/what I am called by

What I would delight in and end enjoy

Indulgence

Presence

Aliveness

Knowing

“Everyday is a holy day”

Saying Yes and No to invitations

Ease, awareness, fun and joy

Lightness and playfulness

Wonder

Amazement

Innocence (which can be child-like, but not childish)

Love

Enthusiasm

Contentment

Magic

Mystery

Synchronicity

Humility

Gratitude

Trusting

Authenticity

Courage

Intelligence

Letting go

Not knowing

Being our full selves

Remembering and forgetting

Acceptance of what is

Based on the present moment; only NOW exists.

“Next time…”

Awake

…

I draw a frontier between these worlds as the line for Conscious Leadership.

We were also reminded about the difference between a healthy culture, where the rules are designed so that when you follow them, things get better, whereas in an unhealthy culture, when you follow the rules, things get worse…

World 1 is a normal world.

World 2 is a natural world.

In World 1, you can get it wrong. In World 2, there is only learning and experience.

We get to try things, instead of making new rules…